My Hero

I bestow my immortal being to let go your deepest despair

The Best of What’s Around – Dave Matthews Band

Pekanbaru, March 20, 2008:

My dear Veny Astrid,

I’ll never forget your smiles, sweetie. I couldn’t stop saying it. I’m sorry; we never had that chance but your smiles so closed to my heart.    

You said you left for a while….and forever. I saw you, still cute and smiled. I held my tears for not having the chance. Thank you, my dear; I’ll keep your smile to my very heart. You know, now you can call me: Bunda. You still can! It’s never too late, right? You still can see me from above, right?   

You taught me a lot, baby and I should’ve told you about this song. You could’ve sat next to me and we could’ve listened together. We would’ve giggled a lot. You know what? Let me dedicate this song for you. You would’ve loved it! I bet.

Thank you, baby;  I’ll do more than ever before.  I may not leave…. Don’t worry, your Mom is in good hands. Just like when you’re here; surrounded by loves.  

Love always, 

Bunda

Ladybug 2

For my one and only Julia.

Love forever,

Bunda

Picture taken from MSN Search: www.franklin.ma.us

coast is clear

julia: bunda? r u there? _____ bunda: JULIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _____ bunda: JULIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA _____ julia: hey bunda _____ bunda: HI BABY _____

bunda: WHATCHA DOING? _____ julia: hi bunda _____ julia: nothing _____ julia: how are you doing? _____ bunda: SO I HEARD IT’S ALREADY SPRING BREAK… ANY PLAN, SWEETIE? _____ bunda: I’M OK, BABY.. _____ julia: well, i am going to mama’s gym on Thursday _____ layla: hi bunda _____ bunda: HI LAYLAAAAAAAAA _____ bunda: *HUG _____ layla: *HUG _____ bunda: OH, SO WHAT R U GOING TO DO ON MAMA’S GYM? _____ bunda: HOW ABOUT YOU, LAYLA? ANY PLAN FOR SPRING BREAK? _____ julia: i’m going to swim _____ bunda: OH OK _____ layla: i’m going to mama’s gym too to play basketball _____ layla: how are you bunda? _____ bunda: OKK…NOWW…HOW ABOUT ZAHRA?? _____ bunda: I’M OK, BABY… GOSHHH…I MISS YOU ALL _____ zahra: i’m going to my homework watch tv, pway with game _____ bunda: OK… _____ zahra: waiiiit _____ bunda: OH OK.. _____ zahra: i’m going to mama’s gym also _____ bunda: OH OK… AND WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO? _____ zahra: i wan to swim with my cheacher _____ bunda: OH OK.. _____ bunda: SO JULIA, LAYLA..TELL BUNDA MORE STORY, NAK _____ bunda: COME ON.. _____ bunda: AND ZAHRA TOO.. _____ julia: well, i been doing my homework. I did some things for my mom and also i hope i can see u some other times _____ bunda:  I CANT WAIT TO SEE YOU ALL! _____ layla: i lost in my last game. but i’m still gonna do some other sports. Oh, i got my first trophy _____ bunda: GUESS WHAT, WHEN YOU AND LAYLA WERE STILL KIDS, YOU DREW PICS FOR BUNDA, RIGHT… I STILL HAVE IT ALL! _____ bunda: REALLYYY???!!! CONGRATULATIONS! _____ bunda_udith (3/18/2008 9:01:10 AM): *HUG _____ layla: it was in the picture mama sent you _____ julia: what are you doing for spring break? _____ bunda: WELL SWEETIE, WE DON’T HAVE SPRING BREAK HERE BUT I’M PLANNING JUST TO HANG OUT WITH FRIENDS ON MY NEXT SHORT VACATION.. _____ julia: oh, ok _____ layla: two more days until my cousin birthday. what do you think i should give him? _____ bunda: HMMM.. I FORGOT HIS NAME… BUT YOU SHOULD KNOW, WHAT IS HIS HOBBY? _____ bunda: WHAT DOES HE LIKE? GAME? BOOK? _____ layla: his name is christian. he like soccer and basketball. he likes games too _____ layla: guess what? _____ bunda: OK…BUT I GUESS YOU SHOULD GIVE HIM NEW GAME THAT HE DOESN’T HAVE _____ bunda: WHAT?  _____ layla: i like jonas brothers. do you know them? _____ bunda: HMMM..I DON’T BABY…BUT I’LL CHECK_____ SINGER? ACTOR? OR BASKETBALL PLAYER? _____ layla: ahk, sussh… _____ layla: YOU DON’T KNOW THEM????!!! _____ bunda: L _____ layla: how could you??? _____ bunda: OK OK..LET ME CHECK NOW! WAIT _____ layla: they are so cute and sing really really good _____ bunda: OH OKK _____ bunda: OK I’M LOOKING AT THEIR PICS RIGHT NOW _____ julia: my favorite jonas brother is joe _____ bunda: SO, WHICH ONE IS YOUR FAVE SONG? I’LL DOWNLOAD SO I CAN HEAR IT _____ layla: my favorite is all of them, nick, kevin, and joe _____ bunda: OK! _____ layla: my favorite song “when you look me in the eye.” _____ bunda: HOW ABOUT YOU JULIA? _____ bunda: OK NAK, BUNDA WILL LOOK AND DOWNLOAD IT _____ layla: *singing* when you look me in the eye….you tell me that you love me….everything is alright, when you right by my side _____ bunda: KEEP GOINGG _____ julia: my favorite song is SOS _____ bunda: HOW ABOUT ZAHRA? _____ bunda: ZAHRA NAK..WHAT’S YOUR FAVORITE? _____ julia And layla: *singing* ooooh, this is the sos don’t want to second guess this is the bottom line is trueeee. _____ zahra: i wike hanna ntana _____ bunda: YAAAAAAAYYYYY _____ bunda: OH OK BABY _____ bunda: WHAT’S YOUR FAVE SONG FROM HANNA? _____ zahra: i wike her song “i miss you.” _____ bunda: OK _____ bunda: I’LL DOWNLOAD ALL THE SONGS, SO I CAN HEAR IT EVERY DAY _____ zahra: oh, the most my favowite song is best of the wowd _____ bunda: OK _____ zahra: * singing and dancing like hannah and montana* _____ bunda: OKKK YAAAAAYYYY _____ julia: i can sing one of the song of hannah Montana _____ layla: thank you for downloading the jonas brother song. YOU NEED TO KNOW THEM _____ bunda: SO WHO ELSE BESIDES JONAS, GUYS?? _____ bunda: GUYS? STILL THERE? _____ julia: i like zach efron (from high school musical ) and corbin blue (from high school musical also) _____ layla: i like….. _____ bunda: UHHH…OK JULIA _____ layla: NOBODY CAN CHANGE THE JONAS BROTHER THAT I LIKE THEM SO MUCH _____ layla: I LOVVVVVVVVVVVEEEEE JONAS BROTHERS _____ bunda: WAIT _____ bunda: LEMME FIND THE SONG OK NAK _____ layla: ok, bunda _____

bunda: JULIAAAA, I’M DOWNLOADING SOS… AND LAYLA, I’M STILL SEARCHING FOR LOOK ME IN THE EYE _____ layla: bunda….. _____ bunda: YES SWEETIE _____ layla: wait….papa told me to turn off the light _____ bunda: OK _____ bunda: AND I WONDER IF PAPA IS ALSO A FAN OF JONAS BROTHER _____ julia and layla: nope _____ bunda: I WAS JUST TEASING PAPA _____ bunda: I FOUND THE SONGS! _____ bunda: AND DOWNLOADING IT! _____ julia: really? _____ bunda: YEAP _____ julia: do you know the song…uhmm……” i miss you” by hannah montana? _____ bunda: I’M STILL SEARCHING IT, NAK _____ layla: i think i need to be a little bit better at school because i have trouble with math and reading _____ bunda: SWEETIE _____ bunda: BUNDA USED TO HAVE TROUBLE WITH MATH TOO.. GOOD THAT YOU THINK YOU NEED TO DO BIT BETTER…BUT DON’T FORCE YOURSELF, OK… _____ layla: yess.. _____ bunda: DO YOUR BEST, NAK… I BELIEVE YOU CAN… _____ layla: ok, bunda _____ layla: then, what is 100 X 100? _____ bunda: OK, THAT YOU CAN ASK MAMA, NAK _____ bunda: HOW ABOUT YOU, JULIA? _____ bunda: AND HOW ABOUT ZAHRA TOO? _____ julia: i’m doing well in school but i really want you to see that the awards that i have _____ zahra: i wove schoow _____ bunda: OHHH… WHAT KIND OF AWARD?? CONGRATULATION BABY! _____ bunda: OK NAKK… I KNOW YOU DO… HOW ABOUT YOUR BALLET??? _____ zahra: i wove ms pawker _____ julia: the award for most A’s and B’s and i wish you can congratulate me in person because i really miss you _____ layla: 100 X 100 is 10000 _____ bunda: I’M SORRY, BABY.. _____ layla: mama told me _____ bunda: YESSSS LAYLA!!!! _____ julia, layla, and zahra: ok bunda…..goooood niiiggghhhht. I love you _____ bunda: I LOVE YOU ALL MORE NAKKKK… _____ bunda: *HUGS _____ bunda: *KISSES _____  julia, layla, and zahra: NO. WE LOVE YOU MORE

 

MASTERCARD MOMENT

zahra: hi bunda _____ bunda: HI SAYANG _____ bunda: *HUG _____ bunda: HI BABY _____ bunda: *KISS _____ bunda: STILL AWAKE, NAK? _____ zahra: thank you _____ bunda: OH OK _____ zahra: yeah _____ bunda: NOT SLEEPY YET? _____ zahra: no bunda, i sweep in de morning _____ bunda: WHY, BABY? _____ bunda: WHY DO YOU LIKE TO SWEEP IN DE MORNING? _____ zahra: i wish i kiss an hug andug and angku an u _____ bunda: *HUG _____ zahra; cause i want to _____ bunda: *KISS _____ bunda: BUT SWEEP IN DE MORNING IS NOT GOOD WHEN YOU HAVE TO WAKE UP EARLY FOR SCHOOL, DON’T YOU THINK? _____ zahra: bunda do u see me an julia and layla an me _____ bunda: YES BABY, I SEE YOU _____ zahra: no school bunda ms.parker say no school…no…no…no _____ zahra: my seacher say that _____ bunda: OHH…OK…WHY? IS IT HOLIDAYING TOMORROW? _____ zahra: yes. it spwing beak _____ bunda: OHHH _____ bunda: OK _____ bunda: SPWING BEAK…OK _____ zahra: and i can’t find my homewok _____ bunda: SO, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ON SPWING BEAK? _____ bunda: HOW COME? _____ zahra: and…no wait i mess up _____ bunda: WHAT IS YOUR HOMEWOK? _____ bunda: WHY YOU MESS UP? _____ zahra: and my school is closed aweady _____ zahra: she wants to say it right. she did that a lot _____ zahra: and one mow….mama so mad at me bcause im pwaying in my house and then my house will be in there _____ zahra: that’s it _____ zahra: and then i said to good bye to ms pawker _____ bunda: HMMMM…. _____ zahra; and that’s it and question mark _____ bunda: OK… _____ zahra: i didn’t finish _____ bunda: I KNOW SWEETIE _____ bunda: GO AHEAD _____ bunda: CONTINUE _____ zahra: wast night mama wead me a stowy _____ bunda: WHAT KIND OF STOWY, NAK? _____ zahra: mama wead me a stowy of dowa _____ bunda: OHH _____ zahra: and that’s it….no more mama _____ bunda: HUH? _____ zahra: i said no mowe mama _____ bunda: OH OK… _____ zahra: *sigh _____ bunda: WHAT HAPPEN NAK? _____ zahra: oh my gowd _____ bunda: WHAT HAPPEN? _____ bunda: TELL ME _____ zahra: my stomach so hungwy _____ bunda: OK… UH, ARE YOU GOING TO EAT SOMETHING? _____ zahra: bunda do you wike peanut buttel and jewy? _____ bunda: I LOVE IT! _____ zahra: i wan peanut buttel and jewy but mama said no _____ bunda: WHAT KIND OF JELLY DO YOU LIKE, NAK _____ bunda: WHY MAMA SAID NO??? _____ zahra: stawbebly _____ bunda: ME TOO! _____ zahra: bunda…. _____ bunda: I LIKE BLUEBERRY TOO, SWEETIE _____ bunda: YES BABY _____ zahra: i want peanut buttel and jewy _____ zahra: quiiiiizzzz….. _____ bunda: OK BABY…ASK MAMA NAK…. _____ bunda: MAMA, GET HER PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY…PLEASE _____ bunda: MAMA… _____ bunda: GET..HER….

A while after….

zahra: BUNDA! I GOT PEANUT BUTTEL AND JEWY! U WANT SOME? _____ zahra: bunda? _____ bunda: YES NAK _____ bunda: GOOD! _____ bunda: *HUG _____ bunda: IS IT GOOD NAK? _____ bunda: I BET IT IS _____ zahra: yess….*burp _____ bunda: OHH, TELL MAMA TO GET YOU OREO COOKIES _____ bunda: OUPS _____ bunda: BUNDA LOVES OREO COOKIES _____ bunda: OREO COOKIES SO YUMMM NAK _____ zahra: i wike peanut buttel and jewy _____ zahra: iz it picy? _____ bunda: NOOO IT’S NOT _____ bunda: IT’S SWEET AND YUMMM _____ bunda: BUNDA LOVES IT _____ zahra: bunda i wike happy face _____ bunda: YOU LIKE HAPPY FACE? _____ bunda: HERE I GIVE YOU MORE _____ bunda: (HAPPY FACES) _____ zahra: happy bidday bunda, andung, angku… _____ bunda: UHHH…OK SWEETIE…BUT IT’S NOT MY BIRTHDAY YET _____ zahra: thank u….. _____ bunda: YOU’RE WELCOME _____ zahra: ooookkkk….happy bidday bunda…. _____ bunda: WHEN YOU COME HERE, I’LL GET YOU OREO COOKIES _____ bunda: OKK BABY…THANK YOU _____ bunda: I’LL GET YOU A LOT OF OREO COOKIES _____ zahra: i wike chocowate _____ zahra: chocowate bre _____ bunda: YEAHHH, THEY HAVE CHOCOLATE OREO COOKIES _____ zahra: chocowate blead _____ bunda: THEY HAVE CHOCOLATE BLEAD TOO _____ bunda: OHHH _____ bunda: DON’T WORRY NAK _____ bunda: YOU’LL GET A LOT _____ zahra: i want to wite my name… _____ zahra: bunda…. _____ bunda: YES SWEETIE _____ zahra: mama so mean to me.. _____ bunda: REALLY? _____ bunda: HMMMM… _____ bunda: WHAT DID SHE DO NAK? _____ zahra: eight, five, six,,,,,no wait _____ bunda: TELL BUNDA… _____ bunda: OK _____ zahra: bunda….i can count…..mama hate me noo _____ bunda: GOOD BABY! _____ zahra: one two fwee fo five six seven eith nine ten _____ bunda: MAMA DOESN’T HATE YOU BABY, NEVER _____ zahra: eweven, tweny one _____ bunda: YAAAYYYYY..! _____ zahra: seee… one hundwed…. _____ bunda: YAAAYYYYY..! _____ bunda: VERY GOOD NAK! _____ zahra: no mama no wike it… _____ bunda: REALLY? _____ bunda: WHY? _____ zahra: a…b…the….d…e…f….g _____ bunda: OKKK… _____ zahra: h..i j …..no wait, i mess up _____ bunda: NO NO CONTINUE _____ bunda: CONTINUE NAK…ZAHRA? _____ zahra; abcdefghijklmmmmmopqrstuvwxythe. now i now why abc nest time no u sing with me _____ bunda: YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY _____ bunda: *HUG _____ zahra: dat’s it no more….i’m tiyed _____ bunda: OH OK BABY _____ bunda: WANNA GO BOBO NOW? _____ zahra: bunda….. _____ bunda: BRUSH YOUR TEETH FIRST _____ bunda: YES NAK? _____ zahra: i wike hanna ntana _____ bunda:  I SAW THE MOVIE ONCE _____ zahra: *singing* tat sain sin dantatnant….hey….wait, i messed up _____ zahra: *singing* abcdefghijk……wait, what nest? _____ bunda: WANT ME TO HELP? _____ zahra: *singing* abc….uhhhmm…. _____ bunda: NEED HELP NAK? _____ zahra: yeah……hannah ntana song bunda _____ bunda: OH _____ bunda: UHM _____ bunda: I DON’T KNOW THE SONG BABY, SORRY _____ zahra: bunda dat’s enof. i’m tiwed _____ bunda: OK NAK _____ bunda: GO BOBO YA _____ bunda: BWUSH YOUW TEETH FIWST _____ zahra: no not ye…..**singing* _____ bunda: OH OK _____ zahra: my head huwt…..ow! _____ bunda: WHAT HAPPEN??? _____ bunda: BE CAREFUL NAK _____ zahra: bunda…i’m tiwed….tun off da lite mama _____ bunda: OK BABY _____ zahra: *start clapping her hand to turn off the light* _____ zahra: u play game? _____ bunda: NO BABY, WHY? _____ zahra: lets pway hannah ntana _____ bunda: UHH…OKK…BUT HOW NAK? _____ bunda: YOU’LL BE HANNAH…AND I’LL BE? _____ zahra: play it and move the money go to lockel….. _____ bunda: UH… _____ bunda: PLAY WHAT NAK? _____ bunda: WHERE’S THE MONEY? _____ zahra: bunda…..mama mad at me….say to sweep _____ bunda: GO BOBO, NAK… _____ zahra: i pway with mama kempwutel…. _____ bunda: *SMILE _____ bunda: *HUG _____ zahra: i go sweep now….by myswef and watch tv _____ bunda: OK BABY _____ bunda: LOVE YOU NAK _____ zahra: *HUG _____ bunda: I LOVE YOU MORE _____ bunda: *HUG _____ zahra: *KISS _____ bunda: *KISS

My sweet Maroon, beautiful Orange & cute lil’ Pinky

Dear Angels,

Bunda is on the good spot. We will catch the ball someday, OK? We will still be playing hide-’n-seek, won’t we? Or, guys talk is always fun. 

If it may, I will tell you about my Oreo.  

Forever love ‘n silly,

Bunda

always proud of her

Shendi Ramli-Hernandez (3/4/2008 10:23:33 AM): based on freudian theory, there is no such thing as a joke…..you mean it because it’s your subconscious wish. But you want to deny it at the same thing because it’s your defense.

Zahra

Me and her

My laughters. My tooshie. My chubby chicks. My sweet Koala. My tiny undeweaw. “Duuuddaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…!!!”. She grabbed it. She pulled it. “Don’t run, baby, don’t runnn…Zahraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…!!!” My happy moment; one of the best. I will always cherish. My kisses and hugs. And more. My rude yet sweet awakening. She is loved by my heart and soul. Let’s go somewhere, sweetie! Far away from everybody! Let Bunda show you the woooorrlldd…! We can play hide-n’-seek! My morning songs. My smell of love. “Yaaaayyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…!!!”. Sayang Bunda. I will always be your Bunda. Always do my best. No pain for you. No tears. I’m here. You are in the safest place. Worth more than million of diamond. My beautiful princess. My cheerful mermaid. My sweet Hercules. I love you, sayang. I love you so much. My unconditional love, God has given. Thank God. My angel. My strength. My sunshine. My moonlight. My shining stars. My raindrops. My pretty snow flakes. My naughty devil. My dragonfly. My beautiful Swan Lake. My cute little Owl. My pink cashmere. My one siwwy Dwarf. My chunky Duck. My Everything. Zahra Imani Hernandez.